1.10 - Lurking in the Shadows

With Shae at work almost constantly, Illdrid took it upon herself to start teaching Aoife the ways of the world. And the first thing she taught her was how to use the potty. Because she wanted to change as few dirty diapers as she could manage.

Illdrid wanted to be a perfect mother, to make up for the fact that her boys had two different fathers that neither of them had met, so she made sure to teach Dagon to speak early on.

"Promotion. Can you say promotion. Probably not. I guess that's kind of a difficult word for a toddler to say. But that's what we hope Aunt Shae comes home with today! Because we need more money!"

"Pwomotron!" little Dagon squealed, enjoying his mother's surprised laughter.

"Close enough, my little darling. Hopefully one day you'll get all the promotions. You can take care of mommy in her old age!"

"Old age!"Dagon parroted easily. He was surprisingly good at this speaking thing.

Shae did receive that promotion, but Evandrus was the only one awake to celebrate with her, since Illdrid was napping with two toddlers. Shae picked up the larva and swung him up toward the sky. He giggled as she cooed at him, incomprehensible baby talk that she intended to be about her promotion and the steady income they were receiving, but really ended up sounding more like "Gwabadoo Boogedy boo!"

Shae's promotion just meant that she had to work harder to rise to the next level. Instead of going to the gym, she helped Illdrid keep an eye on the kids by working out to the Fitness Channel.

"That's right, Dagon. Say thank you to Auntie Shae. She's working real hard to get another raise. And then maybe we'll be able to fix up your bedroom!"

"Raise! Raise!" Dagon chortled.

Illdrid didn't always choose the most appropriate subjects to discuss with the children. Poor little Aoife barely had the basic grasp of the language down before Illdrid brought up the subject of death.

"And then Grim will come and steal your soul and your flesh will decay and all that will be left is bones!"

"Illdrid! Now is not the time to be teaching my daughter about death," Shae shouted from the bedroom.

"Why not?"

"Because your son is about to have his birthday! Oh...and death is not an appropriate subject for toddlers. It scares them!" Illdrid scooped up Aoife, muttering about her sister's admonition, and walked to the kid's room to celebrate Evandrus' birthday.

A few delirious sparkles later....

 A moody rockstar emerged. Oh wait, no. That's just Evandrus.

"Oh, no! We can't have a grumpy Ev, can we? The claw will fix that!" Shae immediately began tickling her nephew. If he understood the concept, Evandrus would be thinking about how to bring a swift and imminent death upon his aunt. Instead, he contents himself with fussing.

The full moon came out to play the evening of Shae’s birthday. Illdrid had taking her leap into adulthood so well that Shae was actually looking forward to it. No more childish naiveté, pining after a dangerous man. She’d finally be able to put the past behind her, embrace the future. Maybe she’d meet a new man. Maybe Aoife would display some fairy powers or wings. Maybe she’d finally be able to go home. 

But the more she thought about it, the less excited she became. And all she could think about as the sparkles consumed her was that this wasn’t what she signed up for. This wasn’t the life she wanted. And as much as she dreamed about returning to the Realm, she knew deep down inside that her dreams were unlikely to ever become a reality. And that was the thought that ruined her birthday.

She might have been happier if Illdrid had been there, but she had received a frantic phone call from James babbling about an emergency. She hadn’t seen him in so long. He hadn’t returned any of her phone calls. It had eaten away at her heart that he wasn’t there to see Evandrus growing up. She had dumped him in the category with all the other men she had encountered since being banished from the Realm. And now suddenly he was calling, claiming there was an emergency. She worried he was using her. Or that he was luring her into a trap, like Derek did to Shae. But Illdrid thought about Dagon, how he might not be with her right now if it weren’t for James, and she knew she owed it to him to help him in his time of need.

When she arrived, he was already waiting outside. His eyes were glazed over and he didn’t look quite himself. Illdrid almost turned around, but he reached out to her, “Illdrid please.” His voice was a hoarse whisper. “I need your blood.” 

Illdrid almost giggled at the absurdity of it, but she could tell he was quite serious. Despite all of her instincts warning against it, she moved closer to him. “Why? Why do you need my blood? Why haven’t you answered any of my calls? Why did you abandon me?”

James groaned, barely able to support himself. “I haven’t been able to break into the hospital to get to their donations. I’ve only ever taken what I needed to survive, but they must have noticed the missing samples, because they amped up the security. I don’t want to feed, to hunt…like some sort of monster. You could help me; help sustain me…if you are willing. I would never…take from you…if you were unwilling. I don’t want to hurt you. I promise, once I’ve gained my strength, I’ll answer your other questions.”

Illdrid nodded her consent, feeling shy and awkward. Every instinct told her to run, escape now. But she couldn’t tear her eyes from his.

He stepped closer and caressed her cheek. “This is going to feel incredibly uncomfortable for you. I’m sorry…” 

Illdrid gulped as his fangs brushed the skin of her neck. She felt her pulse racing beneath his frigid touch. And there, beneath the starry night sky, his fangs pierced her flesh and began dragging the very life from her body. She felt weak, afraid, excited. 

He pulled away when he had enough. “Are you…okay?” he asked, tenderly cupping her face in his hands. Illdrid nodded. She was a little dizzy, but ultimately, she was fine. 

“Are you ready to answer my questions now?” she asked, trying to brace herself for his answers, his rejection. He nodded, taking her hand to sit beside him in the grass.

“The night I destroyed the witch, I took all of her blood into my body, took her whole essence inside of me. I worried that the dark magic that coursed through her veins would begin to affect me. So after our final night together, I decided that in order to keep you safe, I’d cut you out of my life. I didn’t know how the magic would make me react. I told you…I never want to hurt you.”

Illdrid’s brow furrowed at his confession. “But you’ve already hurt me,” she said. “Your absence hurt me. I felt abandoned. Again. We have a child…”

“I know,” he said. “Evandrus. I didn’t trust myself near you, but I’ve been watching. Since our first night together, I’ve felt inexplicably bonded to you. I want to be in your life, in his life. I want to watch him grow. But I just have this premonition of danger if I stay near you. I think it would be best if I stick to the shadows for awhile. Maybe one day…”

Illdrid inched away from him. “You want to stay in the shadows? To protect me? Why won’t you let me make my own decisions? I want you in my life…not lurking in the shadows.”

James frowned. “But I’m trying to keep you safe.”

“Let me worry about my own safety,” Illdrid bit back. 

“No offense, Illdrid, but you haven’t exactly made the wisest choices in regards to your life and safety. Your profession alone comes with so many risks…”

Illdrid shot to her feet. “I don’t have to listen to any of this. If you want to be a part of my life, your child’s life, then I expect you to be an active participant.”

“I can’t do that. I care about you too much.”

“I’m sorry, James. If you cared, you’d be present. Since you won’t do that, please stop skulking about in the shadows…and just stay out of my life.” Illdrid shook her head at him, frustrated and hurt that he didn’t trust her to make her own decisions. She walked off alone, knowing her debt to him had been repaid and that she’d probably never see him again.

...

NOTES: I didn't mean to make this chapter so depressing. It kind of wrote itself at the end there...So to make up for it, have some cute toddler spam!

Aoife learns words. Evandrus LOVES blocks. And Dagon is not amused.Also, apparently thinking about the oven.

Aofie's glowy eyes! Sometimes they work. Sometimes they don't.

 Dagon and Aoife talking. Apparently Dagon is relating what his mother taught him about flower's being the way to a woman's heart.